Very few Anglo-Saxons could read and write. There were no books or schools. The words “read” and “write” meant different things than today. One meaning for read was “to have an idea.” Another was, “To figure out a riddle or dream.” The word “write” comes from an Anglo-Saxon word that meant “to cut.” The Anglo-Saxons fought the Celts for more than a hundred years. Finally, the Celts were defeated. Many of our words are Anglo-Saxon, but few are Celt. But 1500 years later Gaelic is still spoken, written and sung throughout Ireland, Scotland and Wales, and heavyweight champion Joe Walcott, “Jersey Joe,”  was an old 38 in 1952, facing an uphill battle against the younger contender, Rocky Marciano. Walcott weighed 195 pounds. Marciano came in at 187. From Anglo-Saxon we have “fighter” and “boxer” and “bleed.” From Latin we have “pugilist.” The 19th century, time of scientism, positivism and rationality, also produced what Jean Pierre Vernant called “a tissue of scholarly myths, steeped in erudition...shaped by the effort to relate linguistic structures, forms of thought, and features of civilization, yet they were also myths, fantasies of the social imagination, at every level.” The champion was heavier, but Rocky was stronger. Now only a few Celtic words are found in the English language, many the names of rivers and towns. New words joined the Anglo-Saxon language. They came from Christian missionaries, who spoke Latin, and pirates, Vikings from Denmark who brought words like “window” (from “vindauga,” made up of two words, “vindr” meaning “wind” and “auga,” meaning “eye.” Before the Danish word the Anglo-Saxons said “eyethurl,” which meant “eye hole”). By round 13 it looked like the champ, Jersey Joe, was about to hand the Brocton Battler his first loss. Then, 43 seconds into round 13, Marciano landed a short powerful right on the champ’s jaw. He was out before he hit the floor, and the English language was transformed again by the Norman invasion and conquest in 1066. French and Latin became the languages of royalty, government and the courts. But the common people never stopped speaking English, and by 1362 English was once again the official language of the British Isles. Walcott fought Rocky again the next year, but was knocked out by the Brocton Battler in the first round. Rocky retired with a perfect record in 1956, and soon English had its first great writer, Geoffrey Chaucer.

The horns sound and we spook in lockstep. I’ve never known what the recorded trumpeting noise is meant to represent, but believe me, it’s the classiest thing that happens all day.  A dollop of regalness atop our Coors Light and overcooked hamburgers. When everyone else stands, we stand, like hungover Catholics in mass, en masse, ennui. Joi de vivre.

I have a skirt for the track. A big pocket for ready cash, a smaller one for the next race’s tickets, and a very, very small one for winning tickets. My pocket for won cash is empty, yet and often.

It’s the 9th, and the 22 to 1 long shot that my 7-year-old son bet on twice busted early through the gate and then threw her rider.

Lie down with me for a while, and let's sip wine and talk. She is suggestively suggesting. Here's the Times, she says, but I already did the crossword, and it's Saturday. The whole thing. Plus, I also did the sudoku in pen. I get fucked for that don't I baby? Her sarcastic winking and nodding and grinning is adorable.
 
You're a romantic, I say.
 
Yes, more so than you could stomach, trust me. Her. She's speaking again here, and like most women, it not only doesn't end, but it resonates and echoes through my belly, just above my cock, as if I hear a kitten begging for cream. I love the creamy butterscotch of her thighs, and so I'm attentive.